Beauty at Any Cost

The desire to be beautiful is an ageless longing… We desire to possess a beauty that is worth pursuing, worth fighting for, a beauty that is core to who we truly are. We want beauty that can be seen; beauty that can be felt; beauty that affects others…
—Stasi Eldredge

Today’s women are pursuing beauty at any cost. That’s the conclusion of a YWCA report on the consequences of America’s beauty obsession on women and girls. The report notes that American women now spend some $7 billion a year, or an average of about $100 per woman per month, on cosmetics and beauty products. Over five years, that adds up to a full year of tuition and fees at a public college. If a woman were to cut back the amount she spent on beauty products by half, and invest it into her retirement account for 10 years, she would save almost $10,000. And the money spent on cosmetic products per annum doesn’t even factor in cosmetic surgical procedures, of which there are over 10 million a year. The economics of the never-ending treadmill pursuit of beauty are staggering.

The health implications are also substantial. Over half of teenage girls use unhealthy weight control behaviors such as skipping meals, fasting, smoking cigarettes, vomiting, and taking laxatives. More than 80% of women overall are reported to be dissatisfied with their appearance, and almost 70% report that they are trying to lose weight. Research links a focus on physical and/or sexual attractiveness with three of the most common mental health problems of girls and women: eating disorders, low self-esteem, and depressed mood/depression.

The Beauty at Any Cost report notes that women’s interpersonal relationships are also being damaged by this relentless pursuit. Women are taught from a very young age to focus on physical and sexual attractiveness. So interpersonal problems based on issues of physical attributes and social status start young. The use of aggression and bullying has been on the rise, and “mean girls,” -those who display “relational aggression”- grow into adult women who exhibit the same behavior. These women are driven by the unhealthy belief that winning the “looks competition” will somehow get them the man, the career, or the self they desire.

The desire of women to look beautiful is not new. But according to YWCA Chief Executive, Dr. Lorraine Cole, what is new is the unrealistic standard of physical beauty which is relentlessly pushed on females, and the sheer extent to which women and girls are now willing to go to achieve this goal. She laments, “From new levels of spending on cosmetic alteration to health risks and to the emergence of a ‘mean girls’ culture, the lifelong burden of an unattainable beauty and body image is taking a terrible toll in all areas of women’s lives, from economic well-being to health to interpersonal relationships.”

What should we make of this obsessive desire of women to be beautiful? Is the pursuit of beauty wrong? I’m going to answer in a way that may surprise you: First, I would argue that the pursuit of beauty is good and right, and an integral part of our wiring, as women. It’s the way God made us. Second, I would contend that the problem is not that we pursue beauty too much, but that we don’t pursue it nearly enough.

When we consider the jaw-dropping picture painted by Scripture, it would seem that our Lord finds our desire for beauty not too strong, but too weak. We try to doll ourselves up with the earthly and the superficial and temporal, while the supernatural and eternal is offered us. “Like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased!” (to cite a favorite C.S. Lewis analogy).

It reminds me of the story that Jesus told about the pearl of great price. When a man discovered it in a field, he sold everything he had to purchase that field. When the pearl of great price caught his eye, all his other treasures seemed worthless in comparison. He joyfully gave them up to get the treasure whose beauty and value surpassed them all. But here’s the thing. Had he not caught a glimpse of the surpassing beauty of the pearl, he wouldn’t have been willing to part with his meager possessions. He couldn’t give up what was lesser until he caught sight of the greater. The reason women are so obsessed with cosmetics, creams, diets and tummy tucks, is that their hearts haven’t been gripped by a more compelling, more beautiful vision.

True womanhood-the womanhood of the Bible-is spectacularly beautiful; more beautiful than any perfectly proportioned airbrushed model in any fashion magazine. How do I know? Because it reflects the glory of God and the glory of the Gospel of Jesus Christ- and there’s nothing more beautiful than that. True womanhood, and what it represents, is so beautiful that the King of the Universe is enthralled by it (Psalm 45:11) and angels stare -amazed (1 Peter 1:12).

The Bible’s stunning vision of womanhood ought to captivate the heart of God’s daughters more than the glossy pages of the latest grocery store magazine. I hope that it attracts us so much, that we turn our attention from the earthly and superficial, and begin to pursue beauty - true beauty - at any cost.

© Mary A. Kassian